Prinz Myschkin

SO… NFG

Quiet. I haven’t gone to my job for two days. The worst of all is, I don’t care. I used to close my eyes when things were quiet like this. I would take a bar of chocolate, and begin writing. My hands didn’t tremble. I wasn’t scared of dying in a fire the other day.Continue reading “SO… NFG”

An Empty Snail

It started again. The consuming thing slowly creeped into my brain. It took whatever it could from the little hands of my soul. Explain. Sure, today, the first day of class, people talked about what they want to be and so on. they rummaged about their dreams. they kept talking about how passionate they areContinue reading “An Empty Snail”

You Are Not Okay And You’ll Never Be

What are you running for? What is your destination? Why this hurry, my friend, are you lost? People are, in fact, in a continuous pain that you can actually realize it, if you know where to look for the human soul. They are, however, in a stubborn resistance and neglect of their pain so thatContinue reading “You Are Not Okay And You’ll Never Be”

A Mind Full of Nada

Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without. Today, I did not seek the light of truth or right way of living in Buddha’s teachings nor questioned the capitalist understanding of meditation. I simply learned mindfulness by using the most essential tool to my existence: breathing. It was my first meditation experience. Why didContinue reading “A Mind Full of Nada”

Becoming A Tornado

Here I am, sitting in my studying+dining+resting chair, thinking about the dream I had tonight. In this universe of my imagination, a tornado was coming into town. I was so close to it, waiting in awe, and it was a tornado you know —doing its tornado thing—destroying everything, scaring people off, turning the trees upsideContinue reading “Becoming A Tornado”

The Foreigner/ WoaaTh!

My last post was on not speaking for 17 years, wouldn’t that be weird if I did not speak like that? Well, I do speak, and that causes some problems recently. Whenever I speak, for example, people get annoyed or look at me suspiciously, probably asking themselves, who the heck brought her here? Or, howContinue reading “The Foreigner/ WoaaTh!”

Dare Not Speak For 17 Years

I decided because I argued so much and I talk so much, you see, that I was going to stop speaking for just one day – one day to give it a rest. And so I did. I got up in the morning, and I didn’t say a word. John Francis, TED John Francis didContinue reading “Dare Not Speak For 17 Years”

An Oblomovian Existence

“When you don’t know what you’re living for, you don’t care how you live from one day to the next. You’re happy the day has passed and the night has come, and in your sleep you bury the tedious question of what you lived for that day and what you’re going to live for tomorrow.”Continue reading “An Oblomovian Existence”

The Moment Kills All

The moment suffocates me. The moment makes me feel guilty of other past and future moments that are ruined. It chases me. What is all that is about the moment that crushes me? Is that the burden of “choice?” What can I do to feel everything is alright about moment? “Enjoy life. There’s plenty ofContinue reading “The Moment Kills All”

I Accept a Promise of a New Life

“Stone cold faces let you keep you poisoning your bloodCut you open then you’ll see poison in your blood” I like this song. More than that, I was this song. But there is always healing. Right now, I think I began healing. Oh, isn’t this wonderful! I have achieved my dream of having an apartmentContinue reading “I Accept a Promise of a New Life”